The desire to become a better person has influenced me to do some. Laziness has allowed me to avoid much.
From a young age I was taught that judging others was wrong. I was either braced against a desk in elementary or squirming in a bright orange chair in Sunday School. I was told that it wasn’t nice. I was instructed to put myself in the shoes of others. In convincing me that passing judgment was wrong, a subtle notion was constructed, the thought that judging is something I shouldn’t do, despite how fun it can be.
It took until my mid-twenties to realize that any time I judged someone, I was also judging myself. I was part of the comparison. Any particular instance could fill me with pain or pride, but neither feeling is beneficial.
In an attempt to understand my odds of getting into heaven, I once found myself ranking people on how “good” they were. “Well if she’d definitely get into heaven, and he probably would, And I’m definitely better than that other guy over there….” It was a lot of work and after a few minutes of performing these moral gymnastics, I was tired. I realized how much mental energy these pointless thoughts required.
I’m not making personal changes to improve the world. I’m being selfish. I’m just trying to save some energy.
I still make choices on what humans I spend time with. But when someone’s choices don’t affect me and I feel judgments starting to form, I roll my eyes, then say to myself “I’m too lazy to judge you.”
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